Is this why I went to business school? So that I could successfully sit in the seat directly behind the driver and passenger chairs of a 16 seater van with my legs crossed in a way conducive to them losing cognizance of their present attachment to my body while I type out options to validate why I actually spent four years going to business school?
It’s all in how you spin it, and now I’m just spun. Starting when I clocked out of the work world and into reality, if I were to tic with every tock of the clock, the hours of unemployment collected would have wound my head right off by now. Thank goodness my neck is here to hold it in place or my hair would helicopter out, twist so quickly that it separated me right from my shoulders, and fly with amassed momentum to the cosmos. Maybe it’s already happened, is that why everyone always says my head is in the clouds? Maybe they saw something I didn’t, back when I disconnected in my discontentment, disjointed and rocketed face first to the closest planet that would have me, and here I am. It would explain so many things, like why I prefer the Dragonfruit flavored Vitamin Water (no one likes that guy), why I feel so connected to the tiki pole air freshener also in alignment with the center of our car, staring at me uncommunicatively from the front window, why I still order mixed cocktails crafted to transition nondrinkers into heavy drinkers at an early age, why I lose track of time sometimes staring at patterns (as if I didn’t just do that to the woven cloth on the bench style seat I’m positioned on now).